By mudir 
Experience of Safi in the group Shabab Comboni
I found Jesus, the crucified one, who loves unconditionally, touching me and drawing me to him.
Yes, I found him when I heard about Comboni. The truth is that Comboni was initially a name that was unfamiliar to me, so much so that I thought it was Bonboni, the name of a sweet, and I laughed at the name and said, “Let’s go and find out who Comboni is!”
And indeed, I found in St. Daniel Comboni the crucified Jesus, as the book says, “No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” I found Comboni, who did not think of himself but of the salvation of others, as the Master had done before him.
I found Comboni telling me that my hope does not disappoint in the teacher who loves Jesus, the foundation.
So I meditated a lot on the meaning of hope that does not disappoint its owner, and I find myself whenever difficulties hinder me, I find the words of my teacher echoing inside me: Your hope does not disappoint, my daughter. Be strong. I was amazed at my steadfastness without depression.
I began searching for Jesus crucified through hearing about the missions and attending Comboni youth meetings. When I heard his story, I reflected deeply on Comboni, who left Italy, leaving behind luxury and natural beauty, as we say, and went to Africa, a marginalized country where there is nothing but pain, hunger, war, and poverty. How can a person reach this level of faith? How can one be filled with the word of God in the midst of famine? Truly, there is Jesus crucified through Comboni, whom we can see. I admired this person greatly, especially because I wanted to search for Jesus more deeply. I found my priest sharing with us Comboni’s message in a simplified way, which can be summarized as “How do I see man in his humanity?” to express to us the meaning of true incarnation motivated by humanity and love. Jesus showed solidarity with us through incarnation, and so did Comboni with Africa through humanity, presence, and living with them.
This leaves us with a much deeper question: What does Africa mean to us? And I don’t mean its geographical location. We have many questions. Do we have the ability to get along together, despite our differences? I find in these questions what Comboni says, not the priest, and not Saint D. Comboni.
I have realized that following Jesus leads to contentment, serenity, gratitude, hope, trust, and being filled with Jesus.
And I began to wonder who has the wealth and power to fulfill this mission, and I began to wonder even more about Africa. Who is it? Is it myself who cannot forgive those who hurt me, or is it Africa, in the salvation of my sisters and walking with them in a humane way that is filled with divine love?
So my answer was, I don’t have the ability, I don’t have the resources or the languages, I don’t have anything, not even simple, quick, and ordinary prayers. So how can I go and follow Jesus? I am not qualified for the pilgrimage.
I find Jesus sending us a beautiful flower named Heba. I was deeply moved by her story and her life. How much pain she endured, how much rejection she suffered from a lack of love and need! How much loneliness did she feel? She was rejected by her family, by her husband, by love, by everything. How did she feel? Did she cry, suffer, regret, curse her life, and turn away from Jesus?
But the shock was that she smiled. Yes, just as I saw, she smiled at her cross and accepted it with all her love. She spoke and prayed a lot. How great was her faith! Her manner and the sincerity of her feelings touched me. At the end, she concluded with a sentence that echoes in my mind every day, like a rebellious young man who does not accept anything contrary to his desire. “Let God do what He wants, not what you want.” Just accept your cross. Accept the journey with Africa inside you and around you.
How difficult it was to accept without questioning how they do it! For the second time, I hesitated, thinking that I really had nothing to offer Africa. I am just someone who does his job routinely and has no resources, no abilities, no languages, nothing to offer. How could I?
Then I found Jesus answering me in the nursing home through a non-Christian woman who only offered love to her Christian neighbor in return for her help in the past and to her children, in return for the mercy that the Christian woman had shown her in her time of need, only help and love. I don’t know if there was a woman who left her home to come and serve and work in the nursing home. I went to her and hugged her and told her the truth. you know me, love! I prayed for her, that she might have salvation for her mercy and sincere love for her neighbor. Before leaving the home, I found a quote that caught my eye, which read, “No one is so poor that they have nothing to give, and no one is so rich that they have nothing to receive.” Jesus told me at that moment that there are more things I can offer and possess, and that is love, forgiveness, and acceptance for every human being in their humanity in Africa, in our daily lives, in our work, on our streets, in our transportation, in our church, in our friends, and in every person we interact with.
Yes, mission is not about going and traveling far away, but following Jesus anywhere, in any environment. Just talk about Jesus, His word, His crucifixion, and His unconditional love. Just talk and embrace others to find and touch Jesus, the crucified Jesus, the human Jesus. Just be with Him and follow Him, and He will not leave you because He is your hope that does not disappoint.
Safi Ibrahim